Erlina Sidik - Leadership Coach, Trainer and Facilitator

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Charisma: The Leadership Trait They Don’t Teach You In School 

Developing charisma is a skill that you can learn and get better at with practice. Here are some tips to help you build the charisma to authentically connect and attract people to you. 

Imagine if you could confidently walk into any social situation and draw people towards you. You have the ability to captivate and engage others, making them feel inspired, valued, and connected. You leave a lasting impression and can inspire trust, admiration, and a strong following due to your presence and ability to make others feel seen and heard.

This magnetic quality is called charisma and just like learning a new sport or instrument, developing charisma is a skill that you can learn and get better at with practice. Here are some tips to help you build the charisma to authentically connect and attract people to you. 

#1 Own Your Voice

First things first, record yourself speaking and listen to your tone, pace, and the words you choose. It might feel a tad awkward but it's the best way to learn how you are interacting with others. Your voice reflects your personality and fine-tuning it will help you express yourself better. 

#2 Master Body Language

Your body language speaks volumes before you utter a word. Learn to stand confidently with good posture and maintain eye contact to exude self-assuredness. Practice in front of a mirror to help you identify areas where you can improve. Notice that you fidget because you have no clue what to do with your hands? Find hand positions that make you feel relaxed to reduce the need to fidget.

#3 Flip Your Internal Narrative

It’s difficult to feel confident if we don’t learn to switch off our negative self-talk. Replace self-doubt with empowering thoughts. Find a role model you admire for their charisma and visualize yourself striding confidently in their shoes. Get used to feeling confident and soon those feelings will become part of you.

#4 Practice an Introduction Script

Picture this: you're at a party, and someone asks, "What do you do?" Don't just respond with your title—paint a picture of who you truly are. Craft an introduction that invites curiosity and leaves a spark of interest in the air. An introduction is a teaser trailer to your amazing life story and helps people get to know the main character - you!

#5 Spark Conversations with Open-Ended Questions

Want to be the maestro of conversation? Have some open-ended questions on your fingertips that can ignite discussion and engagement. Ask about dreams, adventures, and thoughts—unlocking the door to captivating exchanges that resonate.

#6 Unearth the Power of Storytelling

Storytelling is the heartbeat of emotional connection. Whether it's a funny anecdote or a life lesson, make it relatable and share your stories with others to encourage them to open up and share theirs as well. Stories make conversations memorable and interesting, leaving a lasting impression on the people you meet. 

#7 Embrace Curiosity

Cultivate a genuine interest in people. Listen actively, nod empathetically, and ask questions that turn the spotlight on them. Remember, everyone craves being seen and heard—be the one to shine that light.

Confidence, charisma, and influence are not innate gifts; they are learnable skills. By equipping yourself with these tips, you are armed for success. However, the ultimate stride towards mastery requires stepping into discomfort. Placing yourself in situations where you can apply these principles is where transformation occurs. It's in the act of doing that you refine your influence and charisma, becoming the most confident version of you. 

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